I never much thought about the idiom Be careful what you wish for (you just might get it).
It always seemed kind of silly to me, an oxymoron. Be careful what you wish for --you just might get it? What does it mean? Is it that one isn't deserving of said wish or that one will discover the negatives of that particular wish? Or perhaps it really wasn't what they wished for?
During training with Bo today those words hit me and they hit me hard.
Bo says, "you have 2 months ...", meaning I have 2 months before 5k day. Immediately I refuted that remark doing the math in my head as I jogged along. It's not 2 months that sounds like no time at all--eventually feeling confident of the time line on my run back up I say, "it's 3 months", then I mumbled 3 1/2 actually. Bo doesn't care about the details of the time line. What he cares about is the goal, and the finish line. While he has my goal in mind all that was running through my mind was do this, finish, don't puke. Today I lost the mental battle. Or maybe I gained a greater mental insight. I was 15 reps short of completing what was asked of me. I had struggled all session long. It had been over a week since I worked with Bo. I did not hit a gym while I was in Nor Cal, nor did I go for an extensive hike, or any hike. I did track food and the poorest food choice I made was what my health conscious daughter purchased at the GIANTS game-- a plate of chinese food which we shared. I did drink however, and I drank a lot (a lot by my standards). I did not think having the quick "get away" that I had, this early on in my training would cause that much of a disruption. Bo says it happens to everyone, some time off and you fall back into reset. We just train harder---
Bo says next week we are going to run a mile and in under 15 mins. Despite the mental chatter going on in my head I nodded to affirm, (probably because I was out of breath and couldn't say "ok"). I was ruminating over the whole "you have 2 months" and my immediate defensive response-- though its actually 15 weeks which is more than 2 months does that detail even really matter? Is it a relaxed nature of mine that says "nah I have almost 3 1/2 months, don't sweat it", or is it my fear of success creeping on up behind me getting ready to deliver a swift kick of self sabotage?
Bo's response to me was that he didn't care because I would be 5k ready well before the 5k run. Because he cares that I reach my goal, that I make the run despite any obstacles that may develop. There will be no excuses on race day because I will have been 5k run ready under a variety of different conditions. (like today, tired, hot, sick, HOT etc.)
I get it, preparation is key. Using my (soon-to-be-old) mentality I think, no, I know I have 3 1/2 months, plenty of time to be run ready. But if I were to be run ready in 2 1/2 months what then? What would be so terrible about that? Are there any negatives to being run ready ahead of game time? No, it would just do away with any self sabotaging behavior and it would guarantee me a success.
I'm not usually a defensive person so when I reacted in a defensive manner I had to ponder why? Then thats when it hit me- be careful what you wish for, you just might get it. Do I want this or not? No, do I really want it? ---now that the steps are in action it is on pace to happen. My (old) mentality was to not take on a sense of urgency (because there is none). My rationalizing has lead me to come up short in the past. I think human nature is to think we have time- time for this or that or we tell ourselves this or that will happen "in time". Meanwhile the time is always present but we may fail to make the best use of our available time.
Fortunately for me I'm working on Bo's time now, and yes I want it!
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